This week’s dumbest criminal

August 20, 2010

Elissa Fritz

This week’s dumbest criminal award goes to two Paso Robles residents who went into a hospital claiming they had been assaulted in an alleged attempt to get drugs and ended up being arrested on suspicion of child endangerment and drug possession. [SacramentoBee]

Daniel Jacobsen, 26, and Elissa Fritz, 20, both of Paso Robles, were allegedly snorting drugs in a car in front of Fritz’s 10-month-old child. The pair overdosed in a hospital parking lot before pretending to have been attacked to get more narcotics from doctors inside a Sonora hospital on Wednesday.

Soon police were on the scene, responding to the Sonora Regional Medical Center emergency room about 4 a.m. to a report of two assault victims. Officers soon discovered that Jacobsen and Fritz were being treated for drug overdoses.

Police said the assault was a hoax.

Daniel Jacobsen

After discovering Jacobsen was on probation for a drug possession conviction, police conducted a probation search of the couple’s vehicle. Inside, officers found a marble slab with white-powder residue, items to snort drugs and five types of prescription drugs.

About five hours earlier, a witness saw Fritz and Jacobsen staggering around the hospital parking lot as if they were intoxicated. The witness told police Fritz was holding the infant.

Police Chief Mark Stinson said they created a story about being attacked so they could get more prescription pills in the emergency room. Jacobsen and Fritz were unaware they had overdosed when they went inside the hospital, according to the Sacramento Bee.

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How about this week’s dumbest victim?

The couple who left $25,000.00 in cash under the seat of their car then went to the movies, at the parknride near Santa Margarita. Now my money says it was someone they knew, because dozens of vehicles are parked every day and not one gets broken into…

Yes, I think you’re correct unless other cars had also been broken into. The story say’s that a CO (prison guard) uniform was also taken so it is possible that the uniform could have been the intended target.

Hard to say because remember the Atascadero resident that left her diamond wedding ring valued at 25K in her car and it got stolen? That turned out to be true and the ring was recovered. I initially thought it was an insurance scam claim! One just never knows.

Oh Sheeez,what about that poor baby? Someone should have slipped in a quick sterilization while they were OD.

What’s with Jacobsens’ eye’s? Blue contact’s?

Can’t fix stupid…