The Nextdoor Cayucos church dumpster brouhaha

October 20, 2024

By DELL FRANKLIN

Editor’s Note: The following series, “Life in Radically Gentrifying Cayucos by the Sea,” to be posted biweekly includes the notes, thoughts, and opinions of an original American voice: author Dell Franklin. 

Franklin’s memoir, “The ballplayer’s Son” is currently on Amazon.

Nextdoor, locally, has unleashed a big brouhaha over bad people stuffing their trash and junk into the dumpster at St. Joseph’s Catholic Church behind the Cayucos Market. This is not a good image of serendipitous Cayucos, where people are notorious for respecting other peoples trash receptacles and in some cases dumpsters at larger estates, even if nobody lives in them.

Some of the remarks on Nextdoor are aimed at the very small and discrete homeless population in town, but this makes little sense because most of the homeless people are collecting junk, not tossing it away, and especially in a church dumpster, since Catholic churches throughout history have been compassionate refuges for the homeless.

One member blames it on certain wealthy folks who dwell close by on one of the highest and most palatial hills in Cayucos. I live directly below this hill in an old shack, and I can testify that most of the palatial homes are empty, and this hill is not completely palatial, as there are also modest homes up there, including one owned by my friend Hazel, who has a dog and would never think of depositing any of her garbage anywhere but in her own receptacles.

I also know at least four pleasant people from this supposed palatial hill who walk their dogs past my abode and are absolutely religious about picking up their dog poop and depositing it in trash cans in the busy downtown section of Cayucos.

Anyway, to observe members of Nextdoor driven into such a serious snit, I am wondering what Jesus might have to say about this trouble. And I am sure he would hold no anger toward homeless people with no other alternative but dropping their garbage off in the church’s dumpster, because, after all, Jesus is for the poor and needy and destitute, and not the rich!

At the same time, why would somebody as wise and magnanimous as Jesus suspect dog loving millionaires to become so desperate as to stash large no-longer-useful-and possibly-still-valuable items in a Catholic church dumpster when they could easily bring them to the local thrift shop where I have often spotted homeless people rummaging through things.

Not only that, extremely wealthy people can afford to hire local haulers to dispose of their junk, therefore contributing to the local economy. Unless, of course, the reason they are millionaires is because they are relentlessly cheap.

Other accused culprits are of course “weekend vacationers,” or tourists, who have absolutely no regard for the streets of Cayucos and will deposit their trash just about anywhere. Nextdoor did not fail to put these intruders at the forefront.

Certainly Jesus would be appalled at the behavior of many of the tourists in town, but then again, would he be so cruel as to run them out of a church dumpster when they are the financial beating heart of Cayucos, even if they contribute nothing to the church?

I say no. I say Jesus would bequeath mercy to even the most rowdy, self indulgent, obnoxious, sloppy, trashy tourists, as long as they don’t get too drunk and seriously hurt or kill somebody.

Another tactic suggested by members of Nextdoor is for officialdom at the church to lock their dumpster and open it only when they need to dispose of their trash. Again, what would Jesus think about such a selfish, non-sharing act of exclusivity?

Not well, I’m sure, knowing a locked dumpster might bring out the worst in a desperate person trying to unload trash.

Thus, from my perspective, Nextdoor participants attacking homeless people and wealthy folks and tourists as suspects in the over-stuffing of a dumpster flies in the face of all that Jesus and the Catholic church stands for and makes these people sound, well, petty, mean, and, yes, bored.

I’m thinking the most sensible solution would be for the church to leave their dumpster unlocked and place a security camera that hones in on this dumpster—hopefully donated by members of Nextdoor—if they want to nab these sinners and force them to seek confession.