Detachment and impartiality are the wellspring of a fair trial.

February 16, 2024

Giovanni DeGarimore


I am honored to represent Giovanni DeGarimore. He is charged with committing crimes in our county. He has pleaded not guilty to all charges.

Our Constitution provides that all citizens, even non-citizens, must be afforded the right to compel the prosecutors to present the evidence before twelve tried and true. We are diligently preparing our defense to present in a court of law and are convinced Giovanni will be vindicated.

Social media, media, community scuttlebut, and pre-trial speculations are not the forums where justice presides.

I understand and respect our First Amendment right of a free and vigorous press. But the same Constitution affords my client the right to a fair trial before an impartial jury. We are confident that justice will be found in our courts.

I would love to now disclose the evidence that supports my client’s innocence, but then I would be guilty of trying to bias a prospective jury. Detachment and impartiality are the wellspring of a fair trial. To ensure it, please let’s not rush to judgment.

Ilan Funke-Bilu is an attorney with an office based in San Luis Obispo since 1979. He is board Certified as a criminal law specialist by the California State Bar.


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llan will get him off, so to speak, that’s why you pay the big bucks. I guess if you’re sexually interested in little girls it’s worth it.

Q: How cn you tell when a lawyer is lying?

A: When their lips move.

Not to add any speculation to the mound of speculation, but what does sexual perversion + gun paranoia usually equal?


Yes, barkpony – cocaine.

Well, he MUST be innocent if this guy’s representing him. [that’s sarcasm]

How many female employees filed claims against the fish market for sexual harassment and how many were “settled”? At least 1-2-3-4 times. And Stulberg’s boat is sunk just days after he files on the women’s behalf? And then they trace the kiddie porn to him via Albania?

Giovanni may “get off” because he’s wealthy enough to buy a big bucks lawyer like Ilan, but forgive me if I hold my nose here.

Does Funkyblue even win that often though? Is he even above .500?

I’ve got respect for Ilan, but criminal defense lawyers have no place in a judgeship. Just look at Guerrero.

I completely agree with Ilan, Mr. DeGarimore is owed our accommodation of due process. Any one of us could be on the receiving end of a terrible situation like this, and the public should not rush to judgement. With that said, Giovanni’s history of work place sexual harassment is abhorrent and was enough for me to never again patronize his business.

I absolutely agree with Ilan and “if” malice by the accuser can be proved, hopefully he will do everything possible for his client to be awarded just compensation for the lifetime damage a publicized false allegation of this nature does cause. This will not just go away.

Thank you for your opinion piece. The government was intended to face the burden of overcoming the presumption of innocence…for anyone who has ever been accused of something they didn’t do, we all know the reality is much different. I continue to hope and pray that citizens will do their duty of juror participant under the view point that the person accused didn’t do it until the government proves otherwise beyond a reasonable doubt. Even then, the power dynamic is vastly in favor of the government and it’s virtually limitless resources, so a fair trial is very hard to obtain. Things are often not what they seem to be…

That’s one of the reasons we should eliminate the death penalty from our legal system. Allowing a government to kill its citizens is never a good idea.

I used to be for capital punishment until I began to understand how the criminal justice system works. Then, I started seeing many people exonerated off of death row. Now, I realize that it is completely insane to voluntarily grant my government the power to kill me. Ask yourself…do I really trust my government so much that I will grant it the power to kill me? That’s the proper way to consider capital punishment.

After weighing irrefutable evidence and providing exhaustive due process involving multiple appeals and extensive reviews, it’s not a good idea to allow a government to administer justice to depraved monsters? Here’s something else that’s never a good idea: allowing evil sociopathic barbarians to murder our citizens. If you are uncomfortable with government in the role, perhaps you may look favorably upon allowing murder victim family members the right and responsibility to restore society and justice.