Dumb criminal of the week

September 15, 2010

We love this story out of Watsonville about the guy who threatened to get more bang for his buck out of a local bank. [Santa Cruz Sentinel]

Mark Smith, 59, was arrested last week, after walking into a Watsonville bank, announcing that he had a bomb in his backpack, and demanding $2,000 so he could pay his friend’s rent.

The bank manager suggested that what Smith actually needed to do was take out a loan, and she had him sit down while she said she was going to retrieve the loan paperwork. Instead, she called 911, according to Assistant District Attorney Dave Genochio.

“Quick-thinking staff kept the man calm and distracted him with some paperwork until we arrived,” Lt. Darren Thompson said.

Police arrested Smith, a Watsonville resident, on suspicion of attempted robbery, making criminal threats and making a false bomb report

Smith did not have a bomb or any other weapons and no injuries were reported.

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Lucky for him our would-be banker robber pulled his stupid stunt in Watsonville rather than SLO County. Who knows what our illustrious Sheriff’s Department might have done to him.

They would had checked his car for a bear costume, then, not finding one, they would had let him go.

I like what you guys are saying here but you missed a couple other important things to. The cops probably would have went to a place of a realitives business in a nearby city after hours and busted out the front window. Upon finding this was the wrong place they probably would have went back to their home city and knocked on the wrong neighbors door. Upon realizing this, they probably would have knocked the person to the ground, pryed open their eyes and pepper sprayed them.

Now realizing it was getting late they would have to hurry to another nearby city to not miss their female police chief table dancing. Sadly upon getting there they realize it is to late as she has had to go home and figure out where her gun has gone. Upon heading home the female chief passes a Captain of the local Highway patrol taking a nap by the side of the road, as he was probably forced to drink to much by the local Sheriffs assistant, who is being made to drink by his ex wife. WHEW! That is a lot.